Note: Male to Female ratio of dental office @ 8am. 50/50. All pts (except me) are male. All dental staff (except the dentist) are female.

Note: Men who make dental appts @ 8 am... not very hott, and often have little crying kiddos with them.

Note: Pick up men @ dentists office. Chances are they have a job and insurance. (The dental colleges free cleanings don't count.)

i have

the heart burns.
is no good.
i will have to amputate.
immediately...

I MEAN...


stat.

what have you done for el nino?

sung to the tune of "what have you done for me lately"

i say bring on the nina!

may the pinta, but sure as shit not the santa maria.


I am the Nina The Pinta The Santa Maria
The noose and the rapist
The fields overseer
The agent of orange
The priests of Hiroshima
The cost of my desire
Sleep now in the fire

thats not what i wanted at all.

when i type zombie shark into google,
all i get is zombie vs shark
what i want is to imagine a shark that has become a zombie.
land and air would be no barrier.
imagine that video of the great white eating that seal...
only, that seal is you,
and the shark is a zombie.
and this is all happening on land.

who would win....
a zombie shark or a zombie whale?
or would a school of zombie halibut take over the oceans?

woah... zombie evolution...
how many degrees of kevin bacon between zombie shark and zombie monkey?